So while I have it stuck in my head that I don't really want to be with my ex I am still completely obsessed with what he may be doing. Is he over me? Has he slept with someone else? Is he happy I dumped him? Is this easier for him then it is for me? As a result of this obsession I have taken to checking his Facebook and e-mail (since he previously entrusted me with the login and passwords). I know that anything I find will probably hurt me, but I just can't help it! And I know it's wrong to do, but people do it all the time! And I know it's really low and immature, but I can't help it!
So I checked....
And I was hurt...
I checked his e-mail only to find he had responded to requests for "casual encounters" on craigslist last night. What a scumbag! Has he been doing this all along? While we were together? Or am I just a prude?! I can't imagine just randomly hooking up with people via craigslist! The only saving grace of this experience was that after he sent the girl a picture she stopped pursuing him. He then desperately tried to tell her he looked better in person, which he doesn't! She never responded to his deperate pleas for casual sex.
How is it so easy for him to get back on the horse?!?! Is it just because I'm female and sex goes beyond a physical relationship for me? Or was he over our relationship before it was really over?
Whatever it is I have to get over it. I can't let myself get sucked into being with him again... or his new possible STDs!
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